Timeless Tales of Beatrix Potter by Beatrix Potter

The Before:

The last time I read any of these stories, I was a little kid! I'm so excited to reread!!

The Feels:

It was a nice cozy bunch of stories to read this winter. It really has inspired me to write my own stories. I deeply admire the writings of Beatrix Potter. There is a quaint smartness about them that I wish to emulate. If you need something charming that will allow you to escape from life, if only for a little while, this is the book for you!

The Concerns:

N/A

Score:

Writing Style 10/10

Plot 9/10

Meaningfulness 7/10

A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J. Maas

The Before:

I was warned by ReadwithCindy about this one.

  

The Feels:

I'm just soooo not like other girls. I DON'T SEE THINGS IN LIGHT AND COLOR ANYMORE BECAUSE I AM POOR... unless the color is blood, then I can see that color... I hate my life and my family; my sisters are bitches, my dead mom is a bitch, and my dad is a lil bitch too, however, I did piss myself when the creditors came to break his knee caps like some second rate mafia in the 1940. I have sex with a loser just to feel something, but then shit on my bitch sister for wanting to marry a guy who only wants her for her body. See how gritty and dark my life is? ALsO SomETiMEss I pAInt. 

The Reflection:

This book is not for me...

The Score:

fuckin fairies (quite literally) /10

The Merchant's Daughter by Melanie Dickerson

The Before:

I've tried to read a few of her books before, I always get quickly sucked in by the quickly spat back out.

The Feels:

... Well... that was interesting... DNF

The Reflection:

    Dickerson is very clearly not happy with Catholics. THEN WHY WOULD SHE WRITE A FAIRY TALE THAT TAKES PLACE IN A CATHOLIC VILLAGE IN ENGLAND??? She comes across as very smug... and I think she think's she's being subtle. Don't get me wrong, as a reformed Catholic myself, I take issue with many values of the Catholic Church. However, in order to critique a subject, you must first be able to understand it. I can critique the Catholic Church because I know how it works. I cannot critique a Baptist Church because I DON'T know how it works. In her writing, Dickerson's tone throughout the writing is very condescending of Christian practices at the time. Like the town's priest not having a bible or women being able to read, just not the bible. That's absurd and was not standard practice for the Catholic Church. And the Church is SUCH and easy target when it comes to criticism. Not the pedo priests? Not the abusive nuns? Not the fact that mass was in Latin and 99% of the population didn't understand what was being talked about? NOT THE WITCH TRIALS?!? I mean come on, it was right there! 

    Also, I did not dig the whole "I'm NoT LiKe OtHeR gIrLs" vibe from our main character. Apparently all (other than the main character) women are sluts and hoes and bitches... thanks Dickerson. 

    Honestly, I started off really liking this book. Although I'm not a "Christian" reader, I have been known to like some Christian Romance. The main character, whatever her name was, started off strong, in a more traditionally feminine way, which was really fun. But then she started to interact with other characters and all I could think was oh please make it stop. Felt like going to church and the person giving the sermon really took issue with some irrelevant issues. 

Score:

Writing Style burned down barn/10

Plot 7/10

Meaningfulness 1/10

Ready Player One: The Problem with Nerd Culture

    I am exhausted by nerd culture. For years, I followed multiple fandoms; Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Supernatural, you name it. My favorite place in undergrad was the library. I excited took history classes. I.wrote.fan.fiction.

    And I'm DONE. I just can't anymore. It's too exhausting and I've noticed so much unkindness within nerd culture. This is especially true with it comes to women and people of color, two groups I am a part of. I feel like when talking to other nerds that I have to prove myself and my nerdiness. I refuse to do that any more. It isn't my problem if someone else feels the need to doubt my capabilities and I'm to exhausted by this nonsense to care.

    It really is too bad though. I've been loosing some friendships because of nerd culture. I have/had two friends, a married couple, that are my nerdiest friends. I'm too done with their ignorance. It feels like I have grown in ways they have not. They live in a little nerd bubble and refuse to grow up. They get caught up in the details without noticing their part in the damage of the whole. 

Jenny Nicholson goes over some of this damage/nonsense in this video analysis of Ready Player One https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07w3u8iLa-s&ab_channel=JennyNicholson 

Melt by Demelza Carlton

The Before:

I've read a few other books by Carlton before. Some I have liked more than others. I was excited to see a retelling of one of my favorite, "The Snow Queen".

The Feels:

Uhhhh... It's fine. Not nearly as good as others I have read by her. The plot and writing was a bit of a mess; felt like it was completely random. Feels like she had to crack this one out.

The Reflection:

The initial setting of vague Middle East was a bit of a YIKES. Diversity can be amazing and fun... this is not the way to do it. It also felt like the names were made up, I mean for the vaguely Middle Eastern characters. Maram, Briska, and Amani sound SOOOO close to some very common Arabic names. I Googled them and they are real names, just really really rare; Kurdish, Iraqi, and West African... I think that's too much of a mix when world building. Mariam, Briska, and Armani sound sooo much better in my opinion. (Also did she pick Briska, because it sounds like "brisk" in English?) I'm really disappointed because I KNOW Carlton is a good writer.

Scores:

Plot 2/10

Writing Style 3/10

Meaningfulness 5/10

Christian Romance Novels: A Selection

The Reflection:....

So this post was supposed to be about four different Christian romance novels from the 80s. I couldn't do it. They were the last of the books I purchased this summer and I just couldn't do it! My GAWWDDD those books were bad. I have nothing against Christian authors or romance authors. It was just these specific books. They were sooo trope riddled and there was nothing to the plot. Honestly, Christian readers deserve better than this nonsense. 

Scores:

Plot 0/10

Writing Style Jesus?/10

Meaningfulness -1000/10

Flowers in the Attic by V.C. Andrews

Content Warning: sexual assault, incest, violence, child abuse, and I say this with all sincerity, pretty much any trigger you can think of. This book is riddled with triggers. This is NOT a happy book and it does NOT talk about trauma in an intellectual or informed way. Traumatic events in this book are purely plot points and are handled as such.

The Before:

I've read most of this series before. Is it fucked up that I'm considering it a romance and going to review it between Lady Chatterly's Lover and a Christian Romance novel?... Maybe, but I don't really give a shit. See you in hell.

The Feels:

This book is so absurd, you can't help but laugh. It's not good, but you can't put it down. Lifetime turned this series into a movie series and its some of the best work Lifetime has ever done. This is not a book that will make you smarter. In fact, it might actually make you dumber. But it's 2021, your country is a political dumpster fire, and you need to shut your brain off. 

The Reflection:

There is a rape in this book... um so that's a yikes. This book was not written to be taken seriously. Personally, I struggle with rape scenes, but, strangely, I'm ok with it in this situation. I think this is because this book knows what it is. It is not meant to be nuanced or realistic. It is meant to be shallow trash. This book is so full of over the top trauma that you can't help but not take it seriously. Honestly, the rape scene is the scene treated with the most dignity and that could be why I have some semblance of respect for it. Every trauma that happens is just a random plot point. If you picked up this book and thought it was going to be meaningful, you would have quit long before the rape. That all being said, if you are in a place in your life where you are finding ways to cope with some trauma, this is probably not the book for you right now. However, I hope you can come to a place at some point in your life where you can read this book and be able to laugh at it in a cathartic way. I wish you the very best and I hope for you to be able to find good ways to cope with your trauma. 

This book is for you if you like soap operas, Lifetime Movie Network, classic gothic novels, Downton Abbey, and 1970's pulp novels.

* I will not be review the rest of the books in this series. They are TOOO trash for me. However, I highly recommend the Lifetime movies in this series. One of those rare times that the movie is better than the book.*

Scores:

Plot..... 10/10

Writing Style..... Incest family tree/10

Meaningfulness...... -57/10

Lady Chatterly's Lover by D.H. Lawrence

The Before:

    I had heard of this book and I've seen bits of the 90s BBC series. There was also an episode of Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries, where Phryne is seen holding a copy.

The Feels:

    I was honestly shocked by this book, in a good way. Right from the first chapter, I can see how this book was banned in multiple countries... Honestly, I think the banning helped the book's dangerously infamous reputation. 

    The writing and is BEAUTIFUL! It's smut, but that doesn't mean it's also not smart. I was amazed at how well crafted it was. I majored in English, and I'm shocked it was never required reading (or even recommended reading). I mean, the sexual scenes are not event that graphic.

 

The Reflection:

    There was a lot about class in this book, more than I thought would be. I wish it was a little more direct. I also wish our main character interacted with more female characters. I understand her isolation, but it didn't feel genuine. The book was also a little too long.

Scores:

Plot 8/10

Writing Style 9/10

Meaningfulness 10/10

Spindle's End by Robin McKinley

 The Before:

    I've read a few books by McKinley before. I even think I've picked this one up before, but just could not get into it. Pretty sure this one is a retelling so Sleeping Beauty.

The Feels:

    OHHHHHHH!! I just loved this one. It reminded me of Ella Enchanted, if anyone remembers that book. It is a cozy little fairytale retelling. Yes, it was Sleeping Beauty, but a lot was added to it. I've made a post on my other blog about CottageCore and OH MY GAWWWDD. This IS the MOST CottageCore. It's a pretty retelling of a fairytale. Not a ton of drama (which I DO NOT need right now). 

The Concerns:

    This is a fluff book, but that's totally ok to read. There really much substance, but I honestly wasn't expecting any. 

Rating:

Plot 8/10

Writing Style 10/10

Meaningfulness 5/10

2021

    A new year is upon us!... and I've finally updated my Goodreads account. This year my goal is to read 50 books and make posts about each one of them for this blog. That means one book a week and one post a week. I know I'll be able to do it! I'm going to start work on some fairytales and then move onto romance for February. I've got some time set aside for mystery! (I thought that would be nice for that icky coldest part of winter.) Then it will be some historical fiction, fantasy, and adventure books. I'm looking for a cozy/adventurous spring. 

New Book; Crazy Bitches

 I think I've started work on a series of short stories. It's going to be a collection of women driven to madness caused by the bull shit they have to go through. I don't know if this will lead to anything, but I feel a sense of catharsis in writing it. I hope that readers will feel the same. I foresee the characters being some antiheros we can all relate to, especially women or more feminine identifying folks. I feel inspired by Gone Girl and other various feme fatals. But instead of being feared, my characters will allow for readers to relate to them, like Breaking Bad or Osarks (the drug one in Alaska, I think... I haven't actually watched either of these shows). I'll post a few of my drafts on here to keep me going. 

Gothic Reads 6: The Two Destinies by Wilkie Collins

The Before:

    I have tried to read this book soooo many different times. It's not bad, I actually really like it, I just keep getting distracted by other books on Cloudlibrary (my library app). I purchased this as an audiobook from Chirp about a year ago. I keep getting through the first few chapters, so let's see how this goes.

The Feels:

This started as good proper gothic romance.

The Concerns:

WOW this was dragged out. This took forever! IT'S JUST THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER AGAIN; they bump into each other but done realize who the other one is. I WANT SOME DRAMA! I want a ghost (a real ghost, not a dumb apparition). I want murder. I want death. I'm disappointed because I have read Collins before and I know he can do better!

Plot 0/10

Writing Style 3/10

Meaningfulness 1/10

Gothic Reads 5: Beetlejuice

 The Before:

    I've seen this movie like once before (in high school I think), so I really don't remember what happens. Here is a young millennial version of what happens. (Yeah it was a little before my time). A girl with some serious 80's goth vibes, played by Winona Ryder, moves into a haunted house with her nightmare of a mother and stepfather(?). The previous couple that lived there are dead and they don't want to cross over because they like their house. Beetle Juice is a demon or ghost that just  likes to mess with people. There are some giant snake worm things like in Dune. I think Winona Ryder dies after they sing the "Put the lime in the coconut" song. Then the ghosts just live in the house?

The Feels:

    *GASP* It's that lady from Cutthroat Island. Yes, I love that movie! (Also I had to look up the name of that  movie by googling "worst pirate movie ever").

    I also like their caseworker, she's pretty hilarious.

    Also I think this is Tim Burton and it doesn't have any main male character has issues with his father plot. That's also a bonus. Unless this isn't Tim Burton, in which case, strike that. *googles furiously* Yes this is Tim Burton. Wait, what? Alex Baldwin was in this? Where?

The Concerns:

    The couple was murdered by a dog?... Jesus! This movie's f*ckin weird. So it's her stepmom and biodad, but they can't see the ghosts. The ghosts won't leave because they like their house, but then they almost leave because they like Winona Ryder.

    Few concerns about people taking their own lives. There was a joke in the waiting room and I guess her punishment is having to work as a secretary for eternity? Then Winona Ryder says she is going to take her own life at one point... And it's sort of played as a joke? Like she's too naive and is just being "over dramatic"?... YIKES

    And then what is the point of Beetlejuice? He just scares people? And then tries to marry a child bride? But then he doesn't because they say his name too many times and Winona Ryder's family abandons her, so the ghosts raise her? And they sing the Day-O song not the Lime in the coconut song?

    They did a lot of drugs in the 80's right?

Plot: 1/10

Writing Style: 5/10

Meaningfulness: 3/10

Gothic Reads 4: Suspense Radio (Vincent Price Collection)

The Before:

    I've mentioned before that I have a love for all things old-time radio! I came across a collection of Vincent Price stories and have been listening to it all week. Here's a link to the collection if you're interested: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3yMLgxIJ2R0&t=11129s&ab_channel=CalebJones

The Feels:

    I really don't know much about Vincent Price, other than he's almost always the villain, which for the most part, rings true in this collection. It's a bunch of great stories, perfect for this time of the year.

The Concerns:

    Obviously, these stories are old, but I'm always a little surprised with some of the"word" choices that are made. Women are also not the most well depicted in these stories. If you're not in the mood to ignore some old-timey nonsense, don't listen to this. I mean as much as I love it, some of the things they say can momentarily take me out of the story. This collection might not be for you and I totally understand.

Plot: 8/10

Writing Style: 4/10

Meaningfulness: 6/10

Gothic Reads 3: Seven Gothic Tales

 The Before:

    This is one that I've had for a while. I can't tell you how many times I've tried to read it. I'm giving it one last shot today.

The Feels:

The Concerns:

Just about fell asleep with this one... Cannot recommend. 

Plot: 2/10

Writing Style: 3/10

Meaningfulness: 1/10

Gothic Reads 2: The Legend of Sleepy Hollow

The Before:

Today is the loviest of all fall days. I woke up this morning and began to read out on my patio (reviews to come). I've been so busy with the start of the school year, so I've decided to try something a little different today. I'll be listening to a radio drama version of this wonderful story, which you listen to as well right here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7kVIIVsFMk&list=PLfkJoqn3qIr1CQ5UV3MUa5FY-7JDRcvJl&index=16&ab_channel=PacemakerStudios

The Feels:

What a perfect start to the season! It totally awoken that cozy feeling inside me, which was only helped by my adventure to the apple orchard today. Katrina is much more kind in this version. 

The Concerns:

YIKES! The conversations in that classroom... The teacher actually hits a kid and we hear the slap. Ichabod is a bit more of a d-bag. Katrina didn't really lead him on; he was really only invited to a party. He then assumed that meant that Katrina wanted to marry him. Although it wasn't nice for Katrina to have invited him while having an ulterior motive, that shit's on him. He was also pretty awful to his horse. 

Plot: 10/10

Writing Style: 9/10

Meaningfulness (Yeah... it just dawned on me that this is in fact a real word and yes I have been spelling it wrong all these months...): 8/10

Gothic Reads 1: Mexican Gothic

The Before:

    Well I obviously have to start the season off right with this big summer hit! Mexican Gothic by Silvia Moreno-Garcia is about a young woman in the 1950's who is trying to help her newly married cousin that is suffering from some sort of strange illness. Also Yay! New Adult novel. 

The Feels:

    YAAAASSS!! Woman of color lead? Set in Mexico? I'm here for it. Everything is quite literally an homage/criticism of everything Gothic. You've got The Yellow Wallpaper, Rebecca, The Fall of the House of Usher, The Cathulu guy that was super into racism/eugenics so I'm not going to bother looking up his name (she was obviously critical of him), and a bazzilion more. Even got a little nod towards the film Crimson Peak. This is a perfect book for experts of the Gothic genre. 

The Concerns:

    Um... There might be a few rape scenes in this novel? I hate that I honestly don't know if they are or are not. Just left me feeling weird. Not of fan of that part. Taking off some points for that...

    The plot was also a bit slow. Wish the ending was a bit darker/more tragic.

Plot: 8/10

Writing Style: 9/10

Meaningfulness: 10/10

Gothic Reads: Intro

     As summer slowly draws to a close, my attitudes towards Gothic Lit have heightened. Gothic Literature is my absolute favorite genre, (other than perhaps fairy tales). Although I have always enjoyed the Gothic, I learned more about it when I studied abroad. I took a Romantic class, which turned out to be a Gothic Romance class. Some of the novels I remember the best are The Monk by Mathew Lewis, Mysteries of Udolpho by Anne Radcliffe (NO I did not read the WHOLE thing), Lady Audley's Secret by Mary Elizabeth Braddon, The Woman in White by Wilkie Collins, and (of course) Frankenstein. I absolutely loved everything we read, even Udolpho, which if soooo f*cking long. 

     This autumn, I have decided to rededicate myself to the Gothic, after all, my novel is not just a Romance; it is a Gothic Romance. Some of these books will be ones I have on my "To Read" shelf and have been there for some time. I cannot wait for you to join me on this adventure of the Gothic.

Summer Reads 38: The Indian Fan by Victoria Holt

 The Before:

This one was just a bunch of romantic-gothic stories I've collected. I'm at the point of my Summer Reads list where I'll be getting into more of what I would like to be writing.

The Feels:

This book has sucked me right in! There is a good amount of mystery and countryside building. I know that's not a legit term, but it's something I use to describe those novels set in rural settings and celebrate that sublime visual.

The Concerns:

I'm not a fan of the tension built between our main character and the little sister up at the Big House. The little sister is over the top spoilt bratty kid. It gets a bit cartoonish at points.

A little bit of Orientalism, which is not good. Does not read well in a modern context. Holt is a great writing, and this feels like a book that was written in the Victorian era... and there are parts of that that are realllllllyyy bad. I would like to be able to find a way that turns this trope on its head. How? I don't know yet. Maybe a main character that uses these tropes and then we as a reader realize what a pos they are?

Plot: 9/10
Writing Style: 10/10 
Meaningfullness: 8/10

Summer Reads 37: Susanne Weyn Once Upon a Time Books

 The Before:

I've read these before and loved them! I just was in desperate need of a palate cleanse after that nonsense I put myself through. 

The Feels:

Water Song, I think this one is my favorite! Such a pretty story and I remember the ending make me happy cry when I first read it.

The Night Dance, I lied... this one is my favorite. I'm a giant dork and I love the Barbie Twelve Dancing Princesses movies. I think they're fantastic👸. This is like that, but geared to an older audience. 

The Diamond Secret, This one is so pretty! I don't know how else to describe it. If you like the fake story of Anastasia, then you will like this one!

The Concerns:

I always feel a little bad when the tell the story of Anastasia... I mean we know she died tragically and it isn't good to lump her in with the rest of the fairytales. Although, if I died tragically young, I would love for someone to turn it into a romance-fairytale. That somehow I escaped my tragic fate.

Plot: 10/10
Writing Style: 9/10 
Meaningfullness: 8/10